I Don't Love You (Like I Did Yesterday)

Tear You Apart : A Review

I was absolutely thrilled to be able to view Megan Hart's latest release, Tear You Apart, earlier than release date on Netgalley because we love Ms. Hart's work here at SWBC! For me, it all started with Donna's review of Broken, and it has been a happy (and emotional) love affair since then. 

This review is mildly spoilery.

“See,” Will says, “You never know how thirsty you are until someone offers you something to drink.”

That quote right there kinda summed up the book for me. Or at least Elisabeth's journey. 

What do you do, if one day, you find yourself stuck in a loveless marriage? It wasn't always this way, it wasn't always like the other person couldn't bother doing something as simple as separating his whites from the rest of laundry even after you asked a million times. It wasn't always like you didn't miss him no matter how long he was gone. But what do you do when you wake up one day and realize every semblance of love is just gone? It faded away into nothingness. And all those compromises you made in the name of love are impossible to commit to anymore. 

Will brought color back in her life.

You didn't even realize it, you were numb to it. Until someone offered you a chance at more. Until someone managed to make sparks fly from those embers you once thought dead. 

Our main character, Elisabeth, embarks on an affair. It has such a simple beginning. But Will stirs something in her she didn't think possible. Understandably so, one could argue. I can't say I was cheering her on. Part of me feels like she would have done anything to avoid confronting her marriage and husband and the problems there, and another part of me feels like she honestly couldn't care less. Maybe it was a little of both. Maybe it was that and so much more.

What follows is just a walk through her life after that. Her unwise decision to continue the toxic affair regardless of anything else. She does not want to make the decision to leave her husband, and does not want to stop sleeping with Will. I REALLY wanted her, throughout the book, to confront Ross and just end things with him. But life, as we all learn the hard way, is rarely that simple. 

It might have annoyed me that Will and Elisabeth were a little Twilight-ey in their obsession with each other, but more than Will, I could see Elisabeth's side of why she was clinging to their affair like a life line. It was like watching a train wreck. And I think Will hit the nail on the head with what he said to her in the end. 

I can't say this book changed my mind on things like cheating. But I can say it changed my mind about blindly sympathizing with the person being cheated on. Not that anyone EVER deserves to be cheated on. But it isn't as easy as that. It isn't as simple as black or white. Just like everything else in real life.

Putting myself in Elisabeth's shoes wasn't easy, but I did. Megan Hart has a gift when it comes to showing me what someone is going through. While I didn't really like Elisabeth or Will, I REALLY didn't like Ross either! In fact, all the characters in this particular story were deeply flawed. From Elisabeth, the main character, to Naveen, her best friend, and everyone in between. They all have petty moments, selfish moments, pathetic moments. And it added to how real this story was. 

Don't forget the wine and tissue
when you prepare for a Megan Hart book! 

What I love about all of Ms. Hart's work is that each book is a journey you take with the main character. And no journey is like any other. As always, even when I found myself disliking the characters and/or their decisions, I could still see where they were coming from. Whether the decisions they were making were healthy or not. The stories are raw with emotion, full of messy feelings we try to avoid dealing with, and show us things we shy away from in real life (and in fiction!) 

Megan Hart has certainly changed my view on reading just to escape reality. Sometimes, I now know, you read to familiarize yourself with the ugly things in life. The pain, the heartache, the indifference that can appear in your most cherished relationships long after the happily ever after is over and the wedding cake frozen. Sometimes, you read just to realize the reality of love, that it might not conquer all, that maybe it isn't the fairy tale you were always told it was.

"You never fall in love with anyone the same way you fell in love with someone else. It's always different, every time, if you're lucky - or cursed- enough to have it happen more than once. But I've never been uncertain about love, not any of the times I found myself in it. Love is always real, even when it doesn't last."

Tear You Apart tackles very interesting topics. Topics that you might not come across in another author's work, at least not the way Ms. Hart deals with them. From the all too familiar tale of a mother keeping the family together for the sake of her beloved children, to finding love in the arms of someone other than your long time partner, and that love doesn't always have a happily ever after. It might make you wince, cringe, and squirm in your seat uncomfortably, but there is no denying that it is a story you can't put down and forget. 

A sensual read for many reasons.

Elisabeth's synesthesia adds a certain multi dimensionality to the story telling. It's something I've never come across on page before. But the added layers to the narration makes reading the book an almost sensual experience not just because of the sex, but because you almost SEE the colors when someone talks, smell the scents, hear the sounds of waves crashing against rocks. 



Sometimes, a good book isn't one that just makes you say "oh, that was a good/fun read." Sometimes, it's a book that makes you intensely uncomfortable, puts you in the shoes of someone you don't even really like and shows you that passing judgement from the sidelines is a lot easier than living those decisions. It makes you examine things you don't feel comfortable thinking about, and decisions you would run from making. It puts the well hidden secrets of real life under a giant magnifying glass so you can see every single nook and cranny in stark detail. 

"If I sit there, in that chair, that light will be all over me. I'll be all light, no dark. Nothing hidden. No secrets. He'll see all of me, every wrinkle and crevice, every line, every stray and unplucked hair. There is no fucking way I'm sitting in that chair."

A good book is more than just one you enjoy reading and forget about when you're done. It stays with you long after the last page is turned. And this book, like all of Ms. Hart's books, does that. Dirty was my absolute favorite, but I can not get over just HOW different each individual story is. I salute you Ms. Hart. 

This Wench rated it :

Have you discovered Megan Hart's stunning work yet, Saucy Reader? Did you read Tear You Apart and squirm like we did? Tell us about it below!